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chaosqueen
I understood it a little differently thought helpingmum was worried she upset you Kim 
I don’t even have anything that I hold dear as a reminder of people who have passed away. Luckily my list is short. I was too young to remember my grandfathers much, have only a vague memory of my aunt. As for my grandmothers. One lived far away so I had no clsoe relationship to her. The other one, that I even lived with for close to a year. I think of her fondly when I take care of my roses. Cause she tended to the roses in our front yard. I think of her fondly when I cook certain dishes, as she was a great cook. When I come across the tin pitcher and shot “glasses” she gave me I am annoyed cause I feel a sense of duty to keep them, cause she thought they were worth keeping. Trust me they are not I checked. My mom has a lot of my grandmothers clothes and trust me, if I have have a say in it the polyester stuff is out in a heart beat.
Forgive me for sounding heartless. I think it is just one more way to show how different we are, my memories seem to be tied a lot closer to activities, even though I never tended the roses with my grandmother as I was too little. My grandfather had a liquor cabinet and that smell triggers memories of my grandfather but the cabinet itself doesn’t much.
I also think it is perfectly alright to treasure those keepsakes and everyone has a right to have them.
Helpingmum
I’ve read your replies and thank you for the time and emotion you have put into them. I am sorry if I have touched any raw nerves, I understood how hard being in this situation is, if only second hand. My mum has been referred for cataract surgery, hopefully within the next 12 weeks, so she’ll be able to see better for Christmas. Out of one eye anyway – not being sarcastic here.
My nephew has been over and fitted a new led light in the kitchen so at least that’s sorted. The stairs are still clear, the kitchen floor is still clear but there seems to be more piled up in the dining room than last week. I didn’t mention it as we have had a nice day together, getting her hair cut and going shopping, and I don’t want her to think the only reason I have visited is to check up on her.
We have a Bank Holiday weekend coming up so I’ll visit again and see if we can clear some more items from the downstairs. The lounge looks pretty good, a bit of floor space and no rubbish bags hanging about so that’s good. Just need to get things organised for her so she can find what she wants.
I gave her a pair of reading glasses today that she said helped with her reading so if she can read her books again I think that will help. She also said she needs to exercise to help make her legs stronger and admitted that it is the lack of exercise that has weakened her – no underlying medical reason that hasn’t been explored.
Once we get her lounge sorted, she wants an exercise bike so she can work out while watching the TV. She is under the supervision of the GP and we have checked with him that she’s ok to do this. I have an electric one and she wants this, so the sooner we get things cleared!!
All in all a good week and I am pleased she’s making progress. Maybe we will have Christmas dinner at her house, not this year, but in 2019, that would be great! Can’t remember the last time the family got together at her house for a meal.
Feeling good, and I think mum is too.
bluesyjay
that sounds like great progress and a lot of good news! wishing you more of the same!
Sounds great! The bike will be a good reason to clear more! Smart move to not mention the lcutter that you suspect built up. It might be shifted clutter, not new stuff and a sign that is is working without you, too. Kim2014
Quote:Feeling good, and I think mum is too.
Really nice to hear that.
Nana
Helpingmum wrote:
All in all a good week and I am pleased she’s making progress. Maybe we will have Christmas dinner at her house, not this year, but in 2019, that would be great! Can’t remember the last time the family got together at her house for a meal.Feeling good, and I think mum is too.
Do it this year – even if things aren’t perfect, even if you cook the food elsewhere and eat it off trays – both my parents died without warning, my mum was not 50 when I got a phone call to say she was gone, my dad had just had a successful minor operation and was due for discharge next day.
Don’t wait for a time which might never come.
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